Bears Bills game thread - useless mod/drunk kicker/Xmas edition

Velus Jones caught a pass, had two good kick returns and didn’t fumble…

refs are still garbage.

Gordon so far has hung with Stefan Diggs really well. Gorgeous pick.

Larry Borom at LG is painful.

Both kickers look hammered.

Merry Xmas guys!

 

Gordon has really improved game to game this season.

 

I’m a fan of blitzing brisker and seeing him get to Allen for a sack

 

37 should have blocked that punt. Don’t know why he let up.

 

Hey at least we’re not punting from the opposing 30.

 

Bills have played really soft zone all day. They made the 4th look too easy.

 

Santos can make a 37 yarder look that easy but add 10 yards and the bears have to punt from their own 31

 

You may want to put a spy on that Josh Allen guy, Alan Williams.

 

Of course Nick Morrow is fucking useless

 

Oh God.
I totally forgot they played today. I'm so sorry. Damn.

Our entire township and county are closed down because of this crazy-ass storm so I've been melting snow for water etc.

 

Velus Jones, hot damn.

 

I totally forgot the game was moved up a day from Christmas, plus my wife had to get an emergency root canal.

Though if I were forced to have watched this game or get the root canal, I might pick the root canal. Was it as bad as the boxscore indicates?

 

Root canal was a much wiser choice.

 

I'm still smarting over the useless mod title. It's going to take a long time to fix all my hurt and fragile feelings.

Sobs and Sobs dramatically.

 

You're not useless baby, as long as you continue to make the sammy's

 

Okok. I feel better. Thanks tuna. ❤️

 

How to title this one........

The "Ron Turdner Appreciation Game"?(featuring authentic run run pass on repeat)
The "Velus Jones Lives Game"?
The "Maybe Blang was Right and They Really are Tanking Game"?


All i know is the Lines on both sides of the ball with this team are a fucking crime. In the old days the question of which line is losing us games more would've led to a 20page debate/shitpost thread. They both win. Outside of the 1st Q, it felt like the D-Line gave up 10ypc while notching another sackless game, and the O-Line just got beaten every way you can. Braxton Jones gave up another sack, Scofield spent the entire game in his own backfield, and Larray Borom.....fuck.....Larray Borom. Please get that gender fluid turd team. When Mustiphuck doesn't crack the top3 for soiled mattresses you know you're in a world of hurt.


Kyler Gordon put in another good game. Keep going.


Jaquan Brisker proved why the box score will never tell you the game. 3rd in tackles, the teams only sack and a QB hit........ and yet by far his worst game of the season. No concern, he's had a fine rookie season, but you have to keep it real. He laid an egg in this game.


Fields played about as well as can be expected under the circumstances. Solid QBR, no picks, beautiful throw on his one deep shot, hurt by some killer drops. Pettis killed a drive with another horrible drop on an easy catch on 3rd down. Kmet single-handedly killed another drive by dropping a regulation pass for FD then coming back the very next play and getting blown up on his block for a 4yard loss. Beautiful. There were several instances where the ball didn't come out on time(and even the dolt announcers noticed it) by i have no idea it that was on Fields or guys not getting open, and in terms of trust, how can anyone trust these clowns to come out their break and make a contested catch.


Read a lot about how Fields got shut down as a runner by the Bills. Errr, well they did play him well in broken play yeah, but Fields had 1, 2max designed runs in this game so lets just factor that in shall we. Actually i have no problem with that at all, do that the next 2 as well please. Fields has less than zero to prove with his legs and if these fucks are gonna insist on playing him, then at least try to minimize the hits.


Adam Archuleta somehow found something he's even worse at than playing Safety.


I think it was my sophomore year in college one night me and a buddy got shitfaced in the student union in the middle of winter and near closing time decided to try to steal every coat in the cloakroom. Try to imagine a sumo wrestler made of coats, thats what we were. We had on well over a dozen each, couldn't move our arms and just kinda rolled out the front entrance, straight past the dont-give-a-F bouncer btw, who was clearly unbothered by this sight. Before baby tells me off for being such a shit we did (kinda) return them. We went down the street hanging one coat on each fence post all the way to the student flats. I just wish that instead of fucking straight off home for a joint we'd found a good spot to hideout and watch this stream of extremely pissed off people running around in the snow fighting for a coat, any coat, to get them home. What a dick move. Great times.

.........anyway, there was a point to that story and its that even on that night i dont think we had more layers on than Coach Eberflus during the game ha. Fuck he looked cold. When McDermott shook hands after the game im pretty sure he had no idea if that was Eberflus in there. Know how a picture tells a thousand words? It was like a visual metaphor. "Current Bears HC looks completely out of place". "Eberflus doesn't belong in Chicago" Etc etc.


Speaking of McDermott, FUCK the Bills! You run the score up motherfuckers. I will now enjoy watching the Bills choke away another seasons worth of work in the playoffs just like they did last year.

 

Thanks Ev, I look forward to your colorful take every week even in losing I need a good laugh in spite of this fucked up team.

 

I know he personally wants the QB rushing record but frankly I don't care and I don't want to see anymore designed runs this year. Glad Getsy/Flus finally decided they'd rather reduce the punishment he's taking, which actually goes in line with their tank plan, which I'm also fine with.

I'm not opposed to spoiling the Lions season but we're 2 losses + 1 Texans win away from the #1 pick. If we had lost that Texans game, as we deserved, we could even win 1 of the next 2 and still get the #1 pick.

 

Thanks for all this. Hoge and Jahns basically only said Velus Jones looked good, and Fields didn't have any breakout moments but wasn't bad either.

If the Bears do end up with the #1 pick, is there anyway they don't trade that one? I mean even the Texans might want to trade back up if we get people bidding for the top pick. The Bears have only picked #1 twice, in the 40s. I feel like the second pick people aren't as sold on the QB there, #1, and any QB hungry team is going to come to the table.

Problem is the Texans are terrible and might not win either, the Lions are the Lions, and I'm still not convinced there aren't scenarios that the Vikings rest the final week (I think this week 49ers lose to Vegas and Vikings beat the Packers and that's it, they are 2nd seed with no possible movement right?). A lot of stuff has to go "right" for the Bears to secure that #1. But if they do, the draft and potential trades gets super interesting. Otherwise it seems like it's going to be one of Carter or Anderson.