Dumbass Of The Day

ST. AUGUSTINE (FOX 13) - A Florida woman is behind bars on drug charges, but it’s her name that’s getting national attention.

Arrest records show Crystal Methvin of St. Augustine was arrested on Saturday for possession of, yes, crystal meth.

According to WJXT-TV in Jacksonville, police in St. Augustine say an anonymous call led them to a car parked in a lot on South Dixie Highway. A search of the car allegedly turned up drug paraphernalia and a substance that field-tested positive for crystal meth.

Methvin, 40, was among two people arrested for drug possession.

As of Wednesday, jail records showed she was still being held on $5,000 bond.

 

It's like naming your kid Jeeves and expecting them to not grow up to be a butler or a chauffeur.

 

Looks like fun is introducing him to a new reality

 

English bulldog bites off Scottish man’s peanut butter smeared genitals

A SCOTTISH man has had his peanut-butter smeared genitalia bitten off by an English bulldog. Paramedics were unable to recover them for reattachment.



AN ENGLISH bulldog has been euthanased after biting off his Scottish owner’s testicles, which had been coated in peanut butter.

The 22-year-old man, who has not been named, was found fully clothed and lying in a pool of blood in his Haddington, East Lothian, apartment. He was rushed to hospital where he was put in an induced coma for several days.

He returned to consciousness and co-operated with police.

Authorities say nobody else had been in the apartment at the time of the attack.

The dog, named ‘Biggie’ after gangster rapper Biggie Smalls, was found covered in his owner’s blood.

“Inquiries are continuing to establish how a 22-year-old man sustained significant injury to his groin area,” a Scottish police spokesperson said.

“However, as part of this investigation the owner of the dog, which is believed to have been involved, has voluntarily signed documentation consenting to the destruction of the animal.”

A neighbour told the Daily Record that Biggie was an “an absolute angel.”

“Biggie is such a nice dog. He isn’t aggressive or anything, and he’s quite small. He’s fine with other dogs. The dog is an absolute angel. I was happy to be around him. He gets a bit freaked out by noise but he loves having his belly rubbed.”

Neighbours reported hearing the bulldog barking at around 4am and again at 8am on the October 7, the day of the incident. A loud party was reportedly heard coming from the address.

However, The Times reports police believe no others are believed to have been involved in the incident.

Police arrived at the scene about 2.30pm.

Local media reports the man’s genitalia were not able to be recovered for reattachment.

 

The other dumbass is the owner for voluntarily putting down his dog without all the details.

 

Probably didn't want to have to answer any more press questions like whether the PB was creamy or chunky.......

 

Umm.... SAME dumbass

 

Right. It says his owner's blood. The rest is worded in a weird way when in reference to the rest of the article "However, as part of this investigation the owner of the dog, which is believed to have been involved..."

 

Yeah, it's just an all around weird article and obviously situation. It's almost like they wanted to make the article longer, so they added in mundane sentences. It could have easily been a tweet...

Owner rubs peanut butter all over his junk, HIS English Bulldog bit off his testicles nearly causing him to bleed out and they were not found to reattach. In the owners stupidity, he signs paper to have the dog euthanized, even though he coerced the dog to do what he did. End of story with less confusion.

 

Nice job. I just had to check and it indeed fits in a single tweet.

 

On the 'New Post' portion of the forums it say's - 'Dumbass of the Day'... I keep checking to see if you guy's are talking about me.

 

Only behind your back.

 

Nah.

That's why @Tim invented "Private Messages".

 

From 2007:

 

I'm glad I could just listen and understand in French because it's dubbing over the almost inaudible English. 2nd time all year I'm glad I knew French. The other time was at work when someone didn't know English.

 

I couldn’t stop laughing. That hooved heathen was relentless.

 

It was many years ago, but I lived in Tahiti, I understand some Francais. Nice language.

 

red Gaugin ... in Tahiti.