^^they do have new laws and rules for movie sets and for men and woman starting this year I know that.
I think that you are very naive for sure. All of those people wearing black were making a stand against something? That is crap. Most of these people were wearing black because not wearing black would mean that you were for sexual abuse or else just JOINERS of anything popular. It just another example of what movements like Black Lives Matter are really about. What absolutely should have happened and happened a long time ago, is that the victims of real abuse should have banded together, gotten a team of attorneys and marched into the offices of these major corporations and demanded workplace change. THey also should have filed criminal charges against the rapists, abusers, etc. of them. If anyone gets hurt or threatened by anyone else and does nothing about it, then they have no courage or respect for themselves. Avenues have always existed for victims of abuse of any kind including sexual abuse, rape, discrimination, racial injustice, etc. Just do not sit and take it when it happens.
I absolutely believe your story, cat. I think that you basically made a strong promise to God and asked for forgiveness. Atheists would not understand something like this. That is okay. They've convinced themselves that God doesn't exist so it is illogical for them. It is hard for people to understand why when people pray for something why some get their prayers answered and some don't and when this happens non-believers mock the notion of praying as being total crap. It is a tough one to explain I think. Maybe God has a sort of test in which prayer is sincere and heart-felt and which is sort of self serving. Or maybe God has something else in mind or another test of the worth of a person or the person's make-up itself. I think in general that people want to take the easy way out in things when left to their own devices. It may take a huge test of their make-up for them to truly change their behavior or core beliefs. WHen you said what you said to God, I think that you changed your core beliefs and made a strong promise to God that he listened to and acted upon. COngratulations in doing that!
I absolutely believe your story, cat. I think that you basically made a strong promise to God and asked for forgiveness. Atheists would not understand something like this. That is okay. They've convinced themselves that God doesn't exist so it is illogical for them. It is hard for people to understand why when people pray for something why some get their prayers answered and some don't and when this happens non-believers mock the notion of praying as being total crap. It is a tough one to explain I think. Maybe God has a sort of test in which prayer is sincere and heart-felt and which is sort of self serving. Or maybe God has something else in mind or another test of the worth of a person or the person's make-up itself. I think in general that people want to take the easy way out in things when left to their own devices. It may take a huge test of their make-up for them to truly change their behavior or core beliefs. WHen you said what you said to God, I think that you changed your core beliefs and made a strong promise to God that he listened to and acted upon. COngratulations in doing that!
I got to think that with all of the smart minds in the world that someone could have perfected a 100% reliable lie detector test. Think about all of the problems in the world that would be solved, the need for lawyers, the interrogation of prisoners, etc. Want to clear your name, take the test, fail the test, bye
This is an extremely ignorant statement. The psychological damage done to some victims of sexual assault or abuse renders many of them unable to come forward. There is a fear involved in it...there's also often a feeling of guilt that victims feel...like they somehow are responsible for what was done to them. A lot of times the assault is done by someone the victim knows and that can make it even more difficult for them to come forward. In Hollywood and entertainment...just like the political arena...sexual abuse of women has a long, torrid history and has been basically accepted by the established societies in those areas to the point where people routinely turn the other cheek. That corrupt system makes it hard for victims to come forward. If you were to look back at the history of rape and sexual abuse being reported in this country you would find in a lot of areas that allegations of rape and abuse have been reported multiple times without ever being investigated. Even very recently this has happened....but it's also been a historical problem. You make it sound so simple....but it's never really been so.
What about when a child born with leukemia...through no fault of his or her own....prays for years to be healthy but dies at a young age? Oh yeah....this is where the theist can simply use the "god works in mysterious ways" defense. Or maybe it's the "god wanted to bring his angel to heaven" one. Or is it free will? Yeah...there we go. God loves everyone....but young innocent children suffer all over the globe.
WHo is going to be responsible for "guarding" this cause? Who is the leader or leaders of this so-called movement? Hell, who are the soldiers so to speak of this movement or cause? What about the people who do not JOIN this cause or movement? Are these people to be derided as uncaring or abusers themselves? You know, this is a common charge levied against groups of people who do not take up these new causes. Everyday you see stuff like the BLM or the so-called "dreamer" movement where anyone not agreeing with them labeled as racists and nazis.
Sorry, but people have to get off of their asses and fight back. Sure there is fear involved. Courage is required. But letting fear overcome one solves nothing and only lets the abuse continue or even get worse. People need to fight back themselves and help each other.
I totally 100% agree. But you have to understand and acknowledge that, for a lot of victims, that is easier said than done. And also acknowledge the system and establishment in place has fought against victims for a long, long time.
I beg you to please answer my question. About the child with leukemia. What would be your gods reason for not answering that childs prayers. An innocent child. Not, no offense cat, a drunk that put themselves in the position they are in.
Easy to say and pretty impossible to do. I also do not agree that the system and establishment in place has fought against victims. Rape and sexual abuse is very tough to prove. There is no simple test for who is telling the truth and who isn't and each case has to be treated individually. And when you introduce the Consensual aspect into each case, it is even more tough to prove one way or the other. I don't believe that there is any change on the horizon to eliminate that part of the situation. In the workplace, I think that there is going to have to be a total elimination of anything even remotely considered personal or sexual in order for women and men or transgendered to do their work. No touching. No flirting. No gregarious behavior. Nothing. I think that every private meeting between two people needs to be eliminated because of the potential for he said/she said/it said or he did/she did/it did. Must have a camera or a witness on the scene. What will likely come is a big time change in the way human resources and company and other people in charge manage their workplace. People will not like it because it will make people feel like robots or machines rather than human beings. It is going to be very interesting because in its zeal to allow anything goes in the private side of life, the opposite is going to find itself existing in the public part of the world.
I am not going to answer your question because it is useless to debate an atheist. Cat shared a private experience that I replied to. He made no judgement of your or baby's atheism. You decided to keel haul him with your typical crap, including mocking him for being a drunk.
Then why during the golden age of Hollywood...and up to pretty recent times did Hollywood studios and agents employ fixers? People who's job it was to fix the problems that Hollywood stars got into and keep it out of the press? There can be evidence of rape if the rape is reported in a timely manner. In the case of someone like Weinstein.....the fact that so many people have commented on it saying they knew the stuff he was up to....that pretty much proves itself. It's extremely murky. It's always going to be. The fact that it's murky shouldn't be a reason to take investigate or not take it seriously. The common sense rule needs to apply. There are one on one meetings happening in every office, in every city, all across the country right now. And in 99.9999% of them I'm willing to bet all is fine. A man shouldn't need a rule in place to tell him it's not okay to touch a woman in the workplace. And that's the problem....a disturbing percentage of men don't see that it's wrong.
Cat knows what I meant by the things I said and if has an issue with it he won't be shy to tell me. I am 100% happy that he's happy and healthy. He seems like a really good guy. I'm confused why you can't answer a simple question....maybe it's because you don't have an answer? It's okay to say you don't know.
"The victims of real abuse". What ... as opposed to fake abuse? You really have no idea do you Al? It is patently clear that you have never spoken to a victim of sexual abuse if you can actually say something like this. It might be an interesting experience for you to actually sit down, face-to-face with someone who has been raped or sexually abused and listen (not talk) to them recount their experience. I hope you do, it's a great idea to actually get some foundation before developing your opinion on concepts outside of your realm of experience. Since it may not be possible for you to open your horizons by talking to a victim of sexual assault, you should read this article. I think you'll find it very enlightening. This article is spot on. I don't know if you're aware of this Al but I am a certified Tai Chi instructor as well as holding a brown belt in karate. I have participated in a lot of 1 on 1, 2 on 1 and 3 on 1 spars against men a lot bigger than me. I know how to defend myself very well. In the situation of a rape or sexual assault my mind goes blank and I freeze. This is the typical reaction of someone being assaulted. Why many rape victims don’t fight or yell By James W. Hopper June 23, 2015 James W. Hopper, PhD, is an independent consultant and part-time instructor in psychology in the Department of Psychiatry of Harvard Medical School. He has conducted research on the neurobiology of trauma, and trains investigators, prosecutors, judges, and higher-education professionals on its implications. Here, he offers his explanation of why people don’t always respond to an attack the way others might expect: By James W. Hopper, PhD In the midst of sexual assault, the brain’s fear circuitry dominates. The prefrontal cortex can be severely impaired, and all that’s left may be reflexes and habits. In the Washington Post’s recent series on college sexual assault, many victims describe how they reacted – and did not react – while being assaulted. Another article also published this month, in the Harvard Review of Psychiatry, shows that some responses have been programmed into human brains by evolution. [One in five women say they had unwanted sexual experiences while in college.] [Women describe traumatic experiences.] Bringing together the accounts of those who have been assaulted with the neurobiology of trauma can play an essential role in supporting healing and the pursuits of accountability and justice. For example, freezing is a brain-based response to detecting danger, especially a predator’s attack. Think deer in the headlights. As one woman told the Post, “I didn’t say no, but I didn’t really know what to do. I just kind of froze.” Freezing occurs when the amygdala – a crucial structure in the brain’s fear circuitry – detects an attack and signals the brainstem to inhibit movement. It happens in a flash, automatically and beyond conscious control. It’s a brain response that rapidly shifts the organism into a state of vigilance for incoming attacks and avenues of escape. Eyes widen, pupils dilate. Hearing becomes more acute. The body is primed for fight or flight. But as we shall see, neither fight nor flight necessarily follows. Simultaneously with the freeze response, the fear circuitry unleashes a surge of “stress chemicals” into the prefrontal cortex, the brain region that allows us to think rationally – to recall the bedroom door is open, or that people are in the dorm room next door, for example, and to make use of that information. But the surge of chemicals rapidly impairs the prefrontal cortex. That’s because, despite our dominant role on the planet now, we evolved as prey, and when a lion or tiger is upon us, stopping to think is fatal. Indeed, no one understands better than the military that intense fear impairs our prefrontal cortex and capacity for reason. When bullets are flying and blood is flowing, you had better have some really effective habit learning to rely upon. That’s why combat training is rigorous and repetitive – to burn in habits of effectively firing weapons, executing combat formations, etc. But what if you’re being sexually assaulted and there’s no effective habit learning to fall back on? What if you’re a woman and the only habits your brain cues up are those you’ve always relied upon to ward off unwanted sexual advances – like saying, “I have to go home now” or “Your girlfriend will find out”? Those phrases, and passive behaviors that go with them, may be your only responses, until it’s too late. Countless victims of sexual assault describe just such responses. Too often police officers, college administrators, even friends and family think to themselves – and say out loud – “Why didn’t you run out of the room?” “Why didn’t you scream?” For those who assume a functional prefrontal cortex – including many victims as they look back on what happened – passive habit responses can be baffling. They seem exactly the opposite of how they surely would – or should – have responded. But when the fear circuitry takes over and the prefrontal cortex is impaired, habits and reflexes may be all we’ve got. And if the fear circuitry perceives escape as impossible and resistance as futile, then not fight or flight, but extreme survival reflexes (which scientists call “animal defense responses”) will take over. These can activate automatically when the body is in a predator’s grip – and when, as half of rape victims report, we fear death or serious injury. One such response is tonic immobility. In freezing, brain and body are primed for action. But in tonic immobility, the body is literally paralyzed by fear – unable to move, speak, or cry out. The body goes rigid. Hands may go numb. Collapsed immobility is another. Think possum, playing dead. To see what this looks like (and get a humorous break from this difficult topic), you can watch the YouTube videos that come up for “passes out on Slingshot ride.” Some people describe feeling “like a rag doll” as the perpetrator did whatever he wanted. And thanks to rapid drops in heart rate and blood pressure, some become faint and may even pass out. Some describe feeling “sleepy.” Too often, from precinct stations to courtrooms, victims are met with disbelief: How could it be rape if you were sleepy?! Another, more common reflexive response is dissociation: spacing out, feeling unreal, disconnected from the horrible emotions and sensations of such an intimate violation. Unless someone is drugged or intoxicated into unconsciousness, eventually the brain’s fear circuitry will detect the attack. Most victims will freeze, if only briefly. Some will fight back, effectively. Some will resist in habitual, passive ways. Some will suddenly give in and cry. Others will become paralyzed, become faint, pass out or dissociate. Few who have experienced these responses realize that they are brain reactions to attack and terror. They blame themselves for “failing” to resist. They feel ashamed. (Men especially may see themselves as cowards and feel like they’re not real men.) They may tell no one, even during an investigation. Sadly, many investigators and prosecutors still don’t know some or all of these brain-based responses. [Men with unwanted sexual encounters often fear they won’t be taken seriously.] None of these responses – in women or men – entails consent or cowardice.
Read the article and see where what you're saying here is quite impossible. It's not a conscious decision to back away and not defend, it's that intense fear that impairs our prefrontal cortex and capacity for reason.
I wouldn't say I was a drunk like a old smelly guy holding a can of beer on a corner in a brown paper bag. I worked a FT job, never ran out on a mortgage, wife or kids. Most people in AA can't do that. i paid off my bills and student loan and never harmed anyone but myself. I never drank and drove and hung out at home watching sports. I was the least harming drunk by definition. and bears - I got some bad news for you...many people think alcoholism is a disease. some say a disorder from within your own body to be dependent to alcohol. my parents were alcoholics, so I probably inherited it from them. I didn't put myself in this position. I didn't even drink in High School bc of my parents alcohol fueled fighting. Once I had it in college, it seemed the norm to me. My body, like all drugs, were hooked on it. You, or Al, Baby or Gid etc could or can fight off the urges. To my body - all it did was want more. I didn't put myself into that spot. My body did the craving and wanting for me.
I grew up with an alcoholic father too Cat and he managed to work as president of his firm, drove a lovely Mercedes Benz and was very high functioning through most of his life. I always found it odd that he never drank anything but beer, wine and scotch ... I'd often ask him if he'd like a lemonade or water but he'd politely refused. He was always drinking but never behaved any differently from when he was sober.
